Fitting In

A few months ago I was asked to leave an online group called “Never Been Pregnant” because I enjoyed a chemical pregnancy for 5 days.

It was decidely painful for me, as I had just come off a really shitty IVF and couldn’t find a place in the wide wide world of infertilty web to hang my hat and call home.  

It’s been upbeat since then, you know, with my second IVF yeilding 0 embryos.  

I guess all this heartache isn’t enough, huh?  I also get kicked off online fertility boards. 

Now the person who asked me to leave is pregnant.  And I wonder, was she asked to leave that group as well?


6 thoughts on “Fitting In

  1. That’s complete bullshit! Someone needs to be punched in the ovary for that. Sorry for the language, but that makes no sense whatsoever. I am so sorry that people who should understand what you’re going through are treating you with such disregard. There are places where people are genuinely nice, not total assholes. I’m not sure if you still frequent the boards at, but it was the one place that I felt completely at home, and no one was a jerk to me.

    I’m also sorry to hear about second IVF attempt. Do you have any idea what your next steps are? This just sucks, all the way around.

  2. Silly me, I knew about the second IVF- I was thinking that you’d started/completed your third already! Are you guys changing anything for your upcoming cycle in April?

  3. Urgh! This post made me sooo mad! I, too would like to kick her ass right now, what a BIATCH!!!

    I’m sorry you had to endure such silly, immature and ruthless people, but please know there are many of us (especiall me!) who still adore you and want nothing more than to see you become a mom one day very soon. 🙂

    Chin up a few months, you’ll be joining our unique and supportive IVF Birth clubs anyway!

    Love and hugs,

  4. W.
    That’s so ridiculously insensitive. You barely had a second to feel what a pregnancy would be like in five days! Ok, not that I know because I’ve had zero days, but still. Sometimes those boards are so helpful, and other times I tell myself to avoid at all costs. It’s not like one of those scenarios where you find a board that claims to be TTC #1 and then as you click through the posters you see that some of them are trying for #3 but it just so happens to be with DH #2 or something like that. That annoys me a little bit because I can’t relate. They’ve already had successful pregnancies and just because they are having difficulty now, doesn’t level the playing field, in my opinion.

    That is such crap that they asked you to leave. So not the same thing!

  5. Seriously? This disgusts me. I’m so sorry you had to deal with people like that. Know that there are those of us who are thinking of you and care about you.

    Rooting for a great result from IVF #3. An online friend just recently gave birth to her beautiful twins that were a result of IVF #5 for her. There is still hope so hang in there!! I hope you won’t need 5. Third time is the charm!! Thinking of you. Keep us updated.

  6. Eff her! That’s bullshit. Yeah because losing a pregnancy means you haven’t experience enough pain to be in that group?!? Who says that? I thought we were all in the same IF boat. We all have our own backgrounds but we our bound together by our desire to be mamas, and our struggle to get there. PERIOD. Who are we to judge your pain is worse than mine or vice versa? It’s so upsetting that someone who should be a soft-spot for fellow infertiles is playing God to her precious group? Doesn’t she understand it’s just mimicking the pain of being shut out of motherhood? Eff her!

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